"Aunty Sorry oh!" She must have said that about 46 times but she was anything but sorry. She was doing her job. And her job and current task were well understood by her! INFLICT AS MUCH PAIN AS IS HUMANLY POSSIBLE! I mean, it must have been, right? How else do you explain the pain I feel from neck down! The soreness at the strangest part of my overweight mass of protoplasm!?!
FAT BREAKING MASSAGE
Trust me, this ain't no spa! They say you get used to the pain but that it is necessary to work on the fat from "outside in" while exercise takes care of it from "inside out". There must be some sense to it! But there ain't no sense to the pain, trust me! So this is me, fresh from my first return trip to the gym, excited to be "doing something" afterall about the darned weight! As soon as the massage started, I wondered how I paid good money for this level of pain. Then I started conjuring up every bowl of rice, finger of chips, slice of bread, bite of yam and so on that I had ever had! And I hated them!!! They were the reason why I was going through these! Not sure if that was the 'other' sense in administering these painful massages. but I knew I didn't like food very much right then!
DRINKING POTIONS
I know you will all turn your noses up at this but yes... I drank every last drop! Smelled foul. Looked foul! Tasted foul! Probably horrible for me in the long run (3 months time) but I am happy to cross that bridge when I get there. The first course came in a wooden brown bowl and consisted of herbs that looked like tea leaves and some other powdery stuff. I was m ade to drink every last drop... down to the very last herb! Yuck! Then there was some sweetened, pasty, gummy, black mass of even more herbs. These were all part of the starting pack and were followed up by a take-home pack of more herbs and more other stuff. Hmmm!
DROPPING THE KILOS
They promise that I will drop 4 kilos by the end of the 2nd day. I'll let you know if I do! And... no, I can't share my starting weight... but I promise to share every incremental weightloss figure! Did I here you ask who 'they' is? Not telling! Your guess is as good as mine... LOL
Love you guys!
2 comments:
Don't tell me you have gone to Quincy again, Ulo.
What can I say, Big Sis... When the going gets tough, tough measures are taken. It is really totally about whatever helps... It is that or full obesity with all its attendant cousins. I am lucky to still have low cholesterol levels in spite of my size. My blood pressure is also averagely normal, but the signs are clear that logging this weight around ain't gonna keep me healthy much longer.
There are many other more acceptable causes of death... Not suicide.
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